10 things about the Da Vinci Code and Whack a Mole

1) Word is that Danny Ainge has once again called Seattle to explore the possibility of acquiring Robert Swift. This is where I make a confession: I READ THE DA VINCI CODE! Yes it's true. (Boy is that a relief to get off my chest.)

I do realize that I, along with 40 million other people, am going to hell for all eternity for reading that book. But hey— even though the thermostat is kept up way too high down there, they have a terrific library. All the best books are available!


2) What does this have to do with the Celtics? Everything. Because author Dan Brown got his translation of the phrase "Sangreal" completely wrong.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Grail

Mr. Brown, along with many other scholars mistakenly thought Sangreal meant "Royal Blood." While that interpretation does have some merit, the actual meaning is: "Tall skinny gawky guy who was on the injured list for Seattle most of last season."

Robert Swift, the Holy Grail.


3) Let's face it, Danny Ainge just has a THING for Robert Swift. He LOVES the guy! Personally one of my greatest challenges in recent years has been willing myself to stay up late enough to watch the Celtics when they play on the west coast— so I've hardly ever seen Robert Swift play.

But there's no doubt he's the Holy Grail. None of us can rest until he wears green. None of us. So it is written... apparently.


4) The other reason I have not seen much of Swift, was until May 22nd the Seattle Sonics just have not been worth watching.

I now pause to weep. They got Durant. Ugh.


5) The Celtics have had little luck for two decades now. But I swear that will not last. Some day, some way, it will all change and the franchise will be restored.

6) The Celtics ended up with the worst possible scenario on lottery night- the 5th pick. For 21 years things have been going pretty much steadily horribly wrong. What makes us keep the faith??? WHAT IS IT?

7) Let me digress for a moment. I have a buddy who was a long long long time Knicks fan. I called him up a couple of years back to talk hoops and he shocks me! What does he tell me?: He announces he's no longer a Knicks fan. HE'S BECOME A SPURS FAN! My friend switched to the Spurs! That's like changing religions. I think, "This can't be right."

So after he told me, I paused. "WHAT?!?!?" I thought to myself. Can you really do that? Can you just switch your hoop allegiances like that?

I looked into my heart and came up with the answer. Which is: Yes, you can change your religion, provided you're a Knicks fan or some other fan. But you CAN'T if you follow the Boston Celtics. No. No way.

8) Put it this way. When Michael Jordan won six titles and the entire rest of the world was going ga ga, you know what old time Celtics fans said? They said, "Six titles. That's pretty good."

That's why the Celtics are special. SOME DAY the universe will come back into correct alignment and the green teams will be the greatest of all again.

That day will be glorious.


9) WHACK A MOLE: Admit it. You've hammered moles. You didn't like it much, but you did it anyway. Good for you. Keep at it.

There's a lesson to be learned from that dumb game. Which is, starting right now draft prospects rise and fall quickly. It's early in the process. My feeling is that guys who have been whacked down recently like Brandan Wright and Conley, have plenty of time to jump up again before June 28th. And some guys who are currently flying high will get scrutinized closely and may get hammered down before the draft.

10) That's why this month is so much fun- because you get to try and weed all the false information from the real stuff. June has become one of my favorite months for this reason.

I only want one thing for future Junes: That it becomes my favorite month because the Celtics are STILL PLAYING.